::lauren::

title:
date: Monday, August 28, 2006
time:6:09 PM

sometimes you ask quietly,knowing the answers.
other times your mind searches for em.
but it'll only bring older unanswered questions to the fore.

sometimes you watch people smile.tugging e corners of their lips.
but their eyes never did.
the futility of it all saddens.
and you wonder if you yourself ever did smile like you mean it-
frm within.

sometimes it was a lie.you can feel it.
but i was never meant to convince either.
so you could only go along,with the brittleness of recognising a sad joke.
cos u figured as much.

sometimes understanding come with heart-wrenching clarity.
but regrets dun soothe and guilt dun banish.
you'd hav to admit that underneath it all,you cant forgive yourself.
forgive a hurt like that.

sometimes people deliberately ruffle;then smooth ur feathers.
It makes them hard to read,hard to anticipate.
you edge closer, they pull away.

In some moments we falter,but held ourselves in check.
In that frozen moment was the essence of the road ahead,
we should exercise some common sense.

At some point of time, we'll all come to see that what we've been taught as truth wasnt,
that life was really various shades of gray,
that good and evil were but relative definitions
and that, in a blink of time-
one could easily become the other.

================================
some people are oddly determined to see the better side of ugly situations,
i call tt optimistic :)
and it really makes the days and years so much more merrier.

but theres no avoiding reality,at least i think.
to pretend something wouldnt happen
would only compound the foolishness of a mistake.

ohmy, im getting pessimistic.

but i guess ppl all get pessimistic once in a while.
the more you think, e more problems which surface.and you proceed to think agn.

an absolutely viscous cycle.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

so before i proceed to dwell on my pessimism agn,
shall update my blog wid some cheery photos

Had athena bbq last friday night.
stayed back to study in reading room but decided to sneak in and crash e bbq.
the pit was small n food rather miserably in lack of variety.
but guess the high spirit and fun company made up for it.
yep!
`zhiyun's pulse skittered due to some projectwork.
`serene huixin were busy wid their work.(huixin slacked more)
`yingqun&boon offered comfortin presence albeit e irritations.
`vinci apparently managed to tune in to my frequency tt night.
`rifeng tormented my sore throat by making me laugh continuously.PIG
`zhexi was..ermm....nicer den i expected.haha
`kiam sat wid us but his heart wasnt=P
`xingzhou is e greatest sinner!nv help out but only know how to eat!
`and some dunnohisname guy was really helpful wid cookin e food!

it was a great night out.
n e photos dun look tt dark here i hope.cos adjusted e brightness abit.
but small though.

anyway my class still rawks in a way:D
though sometimes i'll complain bout it=X

glory photo
"we and our thrashbags"
=D

okay both shots r taken using my phone.
but as can be seen.
i look hideous in e left one.
cos we were leaving sch ard 10 n it was real dark.
and somehow my fringe appeared to look like its been cut wid a bowl over my head!!!
damn ERXIN larh!

and e guys claimed tt i 鬼上身-_-!!!
wad crap.....

jaryll sleeping.
in lalaland wid jessica i bet:)

and yeah.danny has a way wid capturing shots.
ilikethisone=))

you always see zhiyun frowning.
but huixin?

seldom.

haha.i bet shes reading some sad sms.

.
anyway time to wrap up this entry.
stay happy ppl.simple as it may sound.

2 more sch days!

comment? / top

title: new blogskin!
date: Thursday, August 24, 2006
time:5:17 AM

heyys dear frens :))
.
ive changed my BLOGSKIN.simplenprettyone!
.
& decided this to be my fav show for e time being=D
.
Everybody should go watch this show!
it'll give you e warm fuzzy feeling of being in love^^
okay i guess thats enough before somebody calls me a BIMBO agn.
.
.............................................................................`
that aside,
.
lemme explain why my supposedly new tagboard is dated all e way back to November2005.
actually its cos i lost e password for my current account.
& switched back to my old cbox account`
.
so those tags were actually frm e period of e ever tormenting olevels papers.
just realised that i actually still come online n read blogs when we'r still taking e papers.
im really damn slack.
.
anyway.those were e days.
.
hope all my anderson frens r doing fine now..
.
............................................................
and since promos are ard e corner wid only 4 weeks grace before it strikes.
i guess we all hav to mugg now.
but i dun seem to be able to get much work done.
.
and end up feeling even more stressed.stupidme.
.
sommore wid trngs suspended for e one mth plus to come.
i suddenly like ive so much free time on my hands.
but yet, theres nth that i look forward to doing really.
.
i wanna PADDLE.roars.
.
................................................................
lifes full of possibilities in jc.
just think tt we should take things slow.
otherwise.
icanttakealleexcitement.
.
................................................................
got to go sch soon!
.
looking forward to our date on saturday!*beams*
.
ehh..and SHUYI is gg berserk wid her WHOOSHING.haha
.
i have silly friends=) but ilovethem`
___________________________________________

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title:
date: Saturday, August 19, 2006
time:8:47 PM

``
`
i just had e most filling dinner.ever.
.
despite e calories put on i still think marginal benefits outweigh opp cost=))
.
having a heart appetite is gd.
.
and huixin i have a whole tub of cookiesncream icecream here!!!!!
hahaha.
.
i show u e pic!
.

haiya.
my mum sucks.
dun let me use e comp.
.
gtg run away....
.
hav a nice weekend ppl!=)
.
continue my post ltr!
.
=)

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title:
date: Monday, August 14, 2006
time:5:28 PM

HAHA.

took a little detour

and stopped by island creamery

for some reverso icecream=D

xingzhou.cc.jaryll.zhiyun.serene.huixin.waikuan.me.boon.and yingqun

all cramped ard a table n licked our cones*YUMMY*

ice cream n great company really brightened up my dull day=))

++++++++++++++++++++++++

well well.

on e way out huixin suddenly had this URGE to pose wid mr macdonalds.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

...........................................

Ah boon decided to hav a go as well.haha.

and initially he just sat there.

YAWN.so boooring.

haha.den he decided to qiao4 his leg! and there u go!

a nice pretty pose=D

OH MY I LOVE TT.

boon rawks my day!

(n lend me fir new album please!)

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

OH.

and i just realised our ct rep's name on newspaper=D

NICE one xingzhou!
..

. ..

++++++++++++++++++++++++++

and was looking thru some random photos in my phone.

found a super memorable one though.

its taken on e day when zhiyun was posted back to hwachong.

and we walked back to njc for e principal to sign e confirmation form.

i still remembered pestering zhiyun to pose beside nj's school gate

holding e piece of paper too gd to be true=)

IM SO GLAD SHES HERE=)

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

on a sidenote,

// pace's been picking up.

and im trailing behind//

and yingqun.yes.

i drew u so nicely on e board just now.

so im not tt mean to u=)

ahhh.ppl remember to study for maths lecture test on friday.

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title:
date: Sunday, August 13, 2006
time:11:19 AM

saw this at mone's blog.
its supposed to be an email.
`
anyway it really made me appreciate little things which seem insignificant before :)
`
I AM THANKFUL:
.
FOR THE WIFE
WHO SAYS IT'S HOT DOGS TONIGHT,
BECAUSE SHE IS HOME WITH ME,
AND NOT OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE
.
FOR THE HUSBAND
WHO IS ON THE SOFA
BEING A COUCH POTATO,
BECAUSE HE IS HOME WITH ME
AND NOT OUT AT THE BARS.
.
FOR THE TEENAGER
WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT DOING DISHES
BECAUSE IT MEANS SHE IS AT HOME,
NOT ON THE STREETS.
.
FOR THE TAXES I PAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM EMPLOYED .
.
FOR THE MESS TO CLEAN AFTER A PARTY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE
BEEN SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS.
.
FOR THE CLOTHES THAT FIT A LITTLE TOO
SNUG
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I HAVE ENOUGH TO EAT.
.
FOR MY SHADOW THAT WATCHES ME WORK
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM OUT IN THE SUNSHINE
.
FOR A LAWN THAT NEEDS MOWING,
WINDOWS THAT NEED CLEANING,
AND GUTTERS THAT NEED FIXING
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE A HOME .
.
FOR ALL THE COMPLAINING
I HEAR ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT
BECAUSE IT MEANS
WE HAVE FREEDOM OF SPEECH. .
.
FOR THE PARKING SPOT
I FIND AT THE FAR END OF THE PARKING LOT
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM CAPABLE OF WALKING
AND I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH TRANSPORTATION
.
FOR MY HUGE HEATING BILL
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM WARM
.
FOR THE LADY BEHIND ME IN CHURCH
WHO
SINGS OFF KEY
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I CAN HEAR.
.
FOR THE PILE OF LAUNDRY AND IRONING
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I HAVE CLOTHES TO WEAR.
.
FOR WEARINESS AND ACHING MUSCLES
AT THE END OF THE DAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN
CAPABLE OF WORKING HARD
.
FOR THE ALARM THAT GOES OFF
IN THE EARLY MORNING HOURS
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM ALIVE.
.
AND FINALLY, FOR TOO MUCH E-MAIL
BECAUSE
IT MEANS I HAVE
FRIENDS WHO ARE THINKING OF ME.
`
`
yeah.sorry for not maintaining my blog much nowsaday.
but i really hav no urge to blog n publicise my life.
.
anyway missed e class outing yest.
sry guys i dun feel well aft trng yesterday.
.
and i lost my TIGHTS.
yes.i left it on e hook in e toliet.
.
now ive nth to wear for trng.how great.
.
and everything needs money.
.
sickening pieces of paper
.
ah,just random thoughts.
.
anyway a fren sent me this email.
quite an engaging game.haha
,
http://members.iinet.net.au/~pontipak/redsquare.html
.
i survived 14.138 seconds.try to beat tt.haha
.
meanwhile i shall go ponder bout oligopoly.
.
damn e econs ilp.ROARS.
.
take care ppl=D
.
remember lihui loves u=))
`

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title:
date: Friday, August 04, 2006
time:8:50 PM

==============================================

Its been one week.

i hope you're coping fine.

cos i've moved on.

and im not looking back.

only ahead.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

haha.that aside,i just got home frm trng

after running a grand total of 6.6km wid yihang ard e sch.

running's GREAT.

and i think everybody should just go SWEAT.

anyway this morning went to pullupbars as usual,

only to discover tt yimtong actually fell sick!!!!!!

and thats like so horrible, cos shes sorta infallible to me.

which makes me really ponder on just how taxing jc life is to many of us.

tutorials are never ending, e moment u are done wid one.

e next fresh copy comes along.

pw is worse.discussions after discussions, meetings, surveys, research.

but guess my grp is finally on track.

cca's a breath of fresh air to e ever stifling jclife,despite e various setbacks n uncertainties.

but its one of e few rare things i look forward to.

not tt jc 1 isnt fun...

first two terms had been a crazy experience

but i guess i'd had my fair share of fooling ard n heckcaring bout schwork.

time to FOCUS!

and haha.funnily enough just as im finally awoken frm my long nap,

i realise tt ppl in 66 r starting to work hard too:))

cherng chu is like so attentive in lessons now...

nengjie's starting to do his tutorials...

and even danny is uptight bout physics spa...

well well, reality always manages a way to creep up behind

n bites us in the back.

so lets all strive to get decent grades in our report cards for promos.

haha in case u're wondering wad exactly provoked me to post this.

cos a certain someone called MUM just received e mail containing e ever holy piece of paper called report card.

AH WELLS.

byebye.gtg explain to her wad U and S means.

*pulls at hair n grimace*

====================================================

comment? / top

title: break
date: Tuesday, August 01, 2006
time:9:37 PM

between now and then.

everything seems shallow.

i pray that one day you will understand.

and yeah.life goes on=)

on a lighter note,

i actually didnt go sch today cos i fell asleep n failed to even start on my EOM.

which sadly was due today.

haha.so i woke up with this grouchy mood.

and decided to stay at home to clear my eom n maybe a tutorial or two.

oh man.

i should kick off these accumulating bad habits.

somebody slap me.

im a bitch.haha.

and spent my afternoon with some simple stranger.

simple lunch .

almost forgotten how simplicity feels like.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

and still i wun change my mind.

so stop speculating stop asking

in fact talk bout it in front of me i dun mind.

just try not to behind me.

comment? / top